Last month, Vogue magazine published a public-infuriating article with the provocative headline “Is Having a Boyfriend Embarrassing Now?” In person, on social media, and in newspapers, people are expressing passionate opinions about Chanté Joseph’s ideas. Some agree; most don’t, but one belief has been at the center of every response I’ve heard, read, or seen: everyone has decided that Vogue believes that having a boyfriend is officially embarrassing.
After hearing this nonsensical claim and the conflicting opinions surrounding it, I decided to read the article myself, and I realized that the majority of those responding to it likely hadn’t. Contrary to what you may have heard, the article does not claim that being in a relationship is something to be ashamed of. The title is a hook, meant to draw readers in, not summarize the article or state the author’s claim. The public’s inability to grasp nuance or go beyond surface level raises concerns about media literacy.
In actuality, the article describes a cultural shift Joseph is witnessing. As a result of women gaining more autonomy in society, being in a relationship “doesn’t affirm your womanhood anymore.” She contends that this has prompted women to post their boyfriends online less in order to focus on authentic connection instead of publicity. Rather than claiming that being in a relationship is shameful, she writes that one’s entire identity revolving around their boyfriend is what isn’t socially acceptable anymore.
The main reason critics have missed Joseph’s point is because they simply saw the headline and decided not to read the article; either because they didn’t feel like reading a whole article or because the title made them so defensive they felt the need to immediately respond. While our shortening attention spans and aversion to long-form content are concerning topics within themselves, the greatest issue is readers forming opinions solely based on one sentence. We were all taught as kids not to judge a book by its cover, so why does laziness continue to override curiosity and critical thinking?
Another cause for these misconceptions could be people letting their first impression of the title cloud their judgement of the rest of the article. Whenever someone reads a controversial question, they immediately start to form opinions and feel emotions, which can cause readers to gloss over lines like, “Obviously, there’s no shame in falling in love.”
In 1960, Peter Cathcart Wason hypothesized that rather than being inherently rational, humans are cognitively wired to favor and seek out information that aligns with our existing beliefs. This is called confirmation bias, and has since been proven as fact, meaning that many people may have read the entire article without retaining any of the information that doesn’t match up with what the title suggests.
However, it’s not all on the reader; the article is by no means perfect. Since Joseph chose to only feature personal opinions or stories, her point gets a bit lost in her bold statements. She quoted a content creator who said that she can become “watered-down online when in a relationship,” and a podcaster who claimed that “having a boyfriend typically takes hits on a woman’s aura,” which discredits Joseph’s claim a bit and can confuse readers. If she had also cited sociologists or other experts, she could have discovered more about the root of the issue, which would have made for a much more interesting article and probably would have made her claim stick with readers more.
Media literacy is more important now than ever to identify misinformation and bias. The ability to form your own opinions and consider multiple viewpoints are skills everyone should have, and they are not difficult to develop; all you have to do is think twice about the things you hear or read. If we want to address and solve issues in our world, we need to learn to keep an open mind, consume media critically, and never assume that something is true just because others believe it.